Racial Identity

In this episode, we explore the work of racial Identity, and our discussion reveals Desmond's resistance to this episode. Jesse shares a nutshell version of his racial autobiography as a white man. We are working not to get cookies for doing the right thing. We are doing this work to be more fully human.

The paradigm is shifting, balance is coming, and shame wants to stop us from the full embrace.

We all have a unique part to play in dismantling white body supremacy in our society, and enter into the discussion of what that can look like for us as educators.

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Notes and Highlights

02:55 Quote: “The job isn’t to catch up to the status quo, the job is to invent the status quo.” Seth Godin

03:21 Jesse mentions the transformation of taking ownership of his racial identity started with Courageous Conversations when he worked for Step Up.

03:35 Jesse mentions the term White Body Supremacy. Look into Resmaa Menakem’s work.

03:54 Inciting incident for this episode: 1619. Desmond- “Race is construct, that has been invented to- among many things- to create free labor and justify the means for creating that free labor. Which was stealing human bodies from Africa.”

05:03 Ruth King- from her book Mindful of Race. Two truths doctrine: We all live in ultimate reality and relative reality. In relative reality we are some body, habituated, ego driven, relating to life through concept. Ultimate reality there is neither race nor reason to suffer, we’re formless, empty of self and eternal.

06:18 Jesse mentions Dismantling Racism Training.

07:26 Desmond- “Racism thrives in the shame. Shame thrives in the shadows.”

09:10 Desmond- “The policies and practices and things that have to change, have to start getting us to the point where we are dealing with the aspects of our own selves and identity that could commit the same atrocities if we were in the same positions.”

10:40 Desmond- “That practice of telling ourselves stories to get rid of the tension and discomfort is what allows us to be bystanders to oppression.”

11:01 Desmond- “As we start understanding what it really means to be human… its these fluctuations, its these cycles. Its while I’m doing my part to change the system, there are times when I am complicit with the harm that the system does. As I do the work to give myself grace in those moments I can come back to doing this work.”

12:02 Desmond- “I have many maps of who I am. But the terrain of who I am, I’m always exploring.”

12:21 Jesse asks “How does your understanding of racial identity….impact you as an educators and what you bring into the classroom?”

13:43 Desmond quotes KRS-One about identity being like putting on a jacket.

14:52 Jesse guides a 2 B.A.R.S. meditation. Breathe. Align. Relax. Shine. To absorb whatever is coming up for you.

17:00 Colleague clip: “Back home (in California) people knew that I was not only Indian, but that I was Punjabi, because there is such a huge community of us. People could tell the state I was from. The religion I was. There was enough diversity to have knowledge around that. Moving to Portland was the first time I learned that I identify as a person of color. I did not know that growing up. I really had no idea. Moving here was a huge culture shock.”

19:26 Referencing Resmaa Menakem again and his concept of clean pain vs. dirty pain. If you haven’t- please go buy My Grandmothers Hands and read it, re read it and reference it often.

21:07 Jesse’s nutshell version of his racial autobiography as white man.

23:19 Desmond- “The ability to hear stories that challenge your view of the world and view of identity and still maintain a connection to the people who share those stories. Thats the leveling up that we need to continue to do.”

23:38 Jesse references J Smooth’s analogy of doing the work around racial awareness is like brushing your teeth and not like getting your tonsils removed. “The belief that you must be perfect in order to be good, is an obstacle to being as good as you can be.” Jay Smooth

26:03 Desmond- “I don’t want to internalize any more than I already have, the division of racism. So when I say I’m a Black man, I say it not because Black is actually a thing. I say it because as long as I know folks that look like me and have had this shared experience identify this way across the globe- thats what I’m down with. I’m not doing it because I want race to be real.”

28:03 Colleague clip- “I got lumped in with other groups that I never really associated with. Growing up most of the people I went to school with were Mexican American. Even then there was enough Indians to know she’s Indian. But here I’ve gotten everything from Indigenous to African- Ethiopian to are you Latinx. People just don’t know and so I got thrown in with that group and I just didn’t know that now I’m somehow a representative of all these other groups that I know nothing about. It was a huge shock.”

28:47 Desmond “ You may personally identify as one way racially, but people around you will say, ‘Ah, no you look like this.’ And I think what really matters is how your treated. So if you present a certain way, then the world is treating you some way based on how you racially present not how you personally identify. That creates tensions within you. But I think for understanding race in the culture its about understanding how the perception of your race as it contrasts and aligns with your own defintion of race.”

29:34 Desmond- “I’m Black because it connects me to my people. I’m not Black because somebody tells me I’m Black.”

30:21 Desmond- “Me knowing the history of racism I don’t want to cling to the race based labels because race is not a thing. But I will identify how I want to identify to find connections with other people. If we’re gonna use these terms thats fine but lets make sure we’re doing it for that purpose of connecting not reinforcing division like race’s original intent.”

31:09 Jesse- As educators we gather in affinity groups… And recently I was invited into this reframe of white accountability groups instead of affinity groups because its about being accountable to white body supremacy and shifting culture.

31:39 Jesse quotes two of colleagues- Darshanpreet “Our education system is designed to educate white boys so its doing what its intended to do.” Gadbow- “The system is set up for white people to feel comfortable.”

32:06 Jesse- “…We have to get comfortable having and normalizing these conversations.” (speaking of white educators)

32:47 Jesse- “Here is the invitation of Worth Work, of inner work; build capacity to follow those triggers, that charge, the uncomfortable- so we can to start to heal.”

32:57 Colleague clip- “For like two years I’d say I just kind of reeled by my lack of understanding. I was at a very diverse middle school and kids of color would come up and talk to me like we had shared knowledge about something. Of course I’m of color but my experience growing up in Central California was no where near as traumatic as theirs here.”

33:31 Desmond “Will the culture change enough to allow us to say- ‘I’m sorry’ ‘okay’ accept whats communicated and move forward.”

33:52- Desmond shares an example of a community building project: learning a students name properly then creating a classroom culture where the burden isn’t on the student to re explain how to say their name every time.

35:30 Desmond- Have those continuous community building practices throughout the year, where you’re providing opportunity for stories to be shared, heard and celebrated. So that kids can get to know the fullness of each others humanity.

36:10- Jesse- “How can normalize transformative conversations about race, acknowledge the charge that comes with that, notice the shame and continue to invite these conversation in a way that invites us to change?”

37:00 Jesse- “I can’t be afraid to make a mistake and take ownership of it. Thats a part of the process.”

37:07 Jesse “As a Worth Work collective I think thats an invitation we can offer- we need young, old, everyone- come together normalizing conversations that are hard to have in a way that brings depth of transformation, creativity and growth.”

37:54 Desmond talking about the process of sharing the process of having a difficult conversation after he said something wrong…

39:58 Desmond- By confronting this harm openly and honestly and working through it, there is a chance for a stronger relationship.

41:15 Jesse mentions a poem he wrote- Accolades Addict. We’re not doing this work to get a cookie. We’re doing this work to be more fully human.

42:00 Desmond- you do this work because its allows you to be aligned and to practice what you value.

42:15 Key Words and phrases freestyle: systematic, 1619, 400 year charge, ultimate reality, relative reality, courage to heal, social construct